Changing Spaces: The Loathing and the Loving, Part 1
A simple office move turns into a battle between loathing and loving. Which side will emerge victorious? I suppose it’s up to me.
After several years in the same place, my department at work is moving from the first floor to the second floor. In keeping with the intent of this blog and the intent of my life view, I’m generally an upbeat person but, in this case, I’ve found a sense of dread creeping upon me. Quietly and completely. It started when our new cube configuration was posted on the wall this week. To be honest, I hate my new location. It’s not just that I hate moving, which I do, but I have several valid reasons for hating this new location. It’s just outside my boss’ office just off a main walkway. Now, I love my boss but she’s got a lot of traffic going in and out of her office and people love to stand and talk in main walkways. I’m as social as anybody but I do enjoy quiet especially when I’m working on a tough project. I don’t want to have to listen to the endless conference calls and meetings and all the other hubbub. Soon, I noticed another feeling creeping up on me to accompany my dread: envy! I started to look at the cubes of my friends who were “better situated” than I. Cubes in low-traffic locations next to windows and the gentle breeze of perfectly positioned and regulated air conditioning vents. I began to calculate how they might have acquired such prime real estate. Perhaps they are more valued than I. Maybe they were secretly given a choice of the best spots. The negativity spread in my mind like wildfire and soon, I not only suspected I would hate where I was sitting, I knew I would. Also, my envy would progress into resentment of my workmates and potentially sour my relationships. The funny thing is that this would all occur in my mind before moving even a shred of paper.
Life is good. I choose to believe that this is true with no exceptions. Life is change. You can’t have one without the other. So, if life is good and life is change then, change is good.
No matter how things appear to me and my limited view, there is an overarching goodness to life that can be enjoyed at all times. There have been countless occasions where an event that I originally judged as bad transformed over time to something I would not only consider to be good but would be grateful for. What lies in that space between that original judgment and eventual gratitude? Misery, discord and confusion. Is it possible to cut out the middle-man of misery and go straight to “Thank you!” for everything that happens in my life knowing that it is all for my good? Knowing that each change in my life only affirms life itself.
I’m changing my thoughts about this move. Contrary to all the evidence I have previously detailed, I choose to see and experience this move as a blessing that is only occurring to bring me more good. When I have thoughts to the contrary, I will remind myself that this is simply not true based on what I know about the nature of life. I expect the Universe rise and support my beliefs. I will feel this support in a decrease and eventual disappearance of my dread, hatred, envy and resentment. These feelings will be replaced by love and gratitude of the present moment. That’s my theory, anyway.
As this is Part 1 of this topic, I plan to check in with periodic updates and let you know how this is going and what feelings are coming up. In the meantime, feel free to experiment along with me and choose a seemingly negative event in your own life and cut out your middle-man of misery.